When I think of porn, I think of sexy women and big penises. Or, if it doesn't involve a big penis, it's a big dildo. There's always some sort of penis involved, real or fake. Women can only get off by penetration it seems like. Of course there is oral sex but it looks like it would do absolutely nothing, or at least it wouldn't cause the explosion of an orgasm that we see in most porn. Moaning does sound good but it is so fake and such a joke. As everyone pretty much knows porn is made mostly for men, gay or straight. Even lesbian porn seems to be marketed mostly for men. It is young, feminine looking women, shaven and long haired, mostly having sex because they want to experiment. Of course experimentation is fine, but when it is portrayed as the only way a woman could have a lesbian experience, and she'll go back to her man after it's done, it's a problem.

Lesbians react to lesbian porn

On TV, lesbians are portrayed kind of the same way: feminine, young, and experimenting. After they are done with that one time fling, they go back to their boyfriend or start dating a new guy. There is that spectrum and women may only have a one time thing with a woman, but again it's a problem when it is the only way we see lesbians: they are sexy and lesbians for men. 

Even in society gays and lesbians cannot be themselves. My mother got married because she thought that was the only thing she could do. Of course she does not regret it because she had me (that's what she says) but it would have been better if she could have always been herself and always been with women from the start. So if lesbians are always portrayed as sexually frustrated women we as a society may not change our views on gays and lesbians. 

Ever since my friend started dating her now husband about two years ago, she has become a very different person. She used to be pretty liberal; she was pro-choice, pro gay rights, and other things that I was for as well. But now she is a conservative Christian Republican who calls women who get an abortion murders and thinks being gay is a choice. A couple months ago she compared my virginity to a wrapped present: every time I have sex I'm unwrapping the present more and more. Eventually, on my wedding night, all I'm going to have to give to my husband is a plain box. This made me laugh... For one thing, losing your virginity is a one-time thing; that present has been a plain box for a while now. Another thing is that she got pregnant before she was married. Sure, she was engaged but that doesn't matter. According to her and her Bible, you have to be married before you have sex. I honestly don't care what she has done, but I care that she criticizes me for this.

I started thinking about how our society and our media represents girls who don't fit into that perfect virginal box. We have seen the affects of Miley Cyrus's performance at the VMAs. It doesn't matter if other performers had acted the same way she did, she is no longer that little girl we knew and loved on Hanna Montana. I know people are probably sick and tired of hearing about Miley Cyrus but she was the first person who came to mind, and I think she makes a really good point. I think the other interesting thing about her is that she took a vow of abstinence, and now that she no longer is in that box and is showing her sexuality on stage (something that is done ALL THE TIME in music videos, by men and women) she is disgusting and a slut. 

My friend believes that her husband should make the money and she should stay home and raise the kids. Right now she is homeschooling her three year old daughter while also taking care of her eight-month old son. I don't know how she does it. She says that the man is the head of the household and makes the final decision as well; she is allowed to put in her opinion but he doesn't have to listen to it. That would drive me insane. This reminds me of the happy housewives, how they please their husband and raise their children but don't complain. This also fits into that box.

I can across this article this morning. This man has come up with 24 reasons for how a woman is classified as a slut. A few of the reasons are: She has tattoos (especially one's that are visible), has a "slut face" ("you either recognize it or you don't", he writes), she's not ticklish (she's used to being touched by men), has big tits (started messing around at a young age because her breasts starting growing in at a young age), and, my favorite of course, says she's a feminist (because most feminist believe in sexual freedom she'll be an easy lay). It's so sad because he has slept with, I'm sure, many women yet here he is commenting on how slutty these women are because they'd hook up with a stranger, the exact same thing he is doing. It's that double standard that we have about men and women: women have to be virgins and pure until marriage and men are excused for sleeping around before they get married.

I was looking through the comments on this article (bad idea...) and I came across this one:

"It was going around Tumblr as a "look how funny this article is" joke post. And then I came in here and saw all these women getting upset about it, and I'm like, "Really? You can't tell that this in jest? Calm the hell down."" 

Of course I get why people say that, but it just doesn't sit well with me. Regardless if this is "in jest" or not, it doesn't matter. It makes people think these sorts of views are okay, that women who sleep with strangers fall under the "slut" category and that all those characteristics make a woman a slut. I believe that the word "slut" is not bad, that it is something a woman can embrace, but I'm sure that's not what the author of this article had in mind.